Chalta hai na!

In my-mid forties, conventionally a good time to start retirement, fate presented me with two choices a voluntary retirement in my own country or a fresh start in a new country.  With reluctance and deep apprehension at some corner of my heart & unbridled excitement at another, we took a leap of faith.

As we landed in the new country and started our life here, amongst the visible stark differences, I noticed efficiency replaced warmth at a DNA level in this country. Zero acceptance against any standard/predefined processes. To share an example, a few bottles of expensive cream which inadvertently made through the Indian customs, found home in UK immigration trash. “Mam, I can’t even get in a bottle of coke if I want to since the day someone decided to blow up a plane using liquid chemicals” was the response to my feeble protests – Polite yet firm- no negotiation.

I missed the fuss of porters rushing to pick your luggage as we arrived at the hotel, we had to mind our luggage and check in. Did we do that? Of course, we did (we had no choice!!) -was it difficult? No, maybe a little inconvenient but not difficult. Was I frustrated or angry doing it? Surprisingly no, despite of being in a flight for good 16 hours! I wonder if it had to something with everything  being so well organized- I did wait at the queue at the immigration surprisingly no one – absolutely no one tried to jump the queue – Why- why are you so disciplined Americans?(I miss my country!!).  We booked a cab on call, What?? no blaring honks!! Nor did I have watch out for unintentional pushes and shoves (all my saved expletives and dirty looks wastedL). All energies were being spent between the intent of finding a car and next execution of that intent. There were no unpleasant distraction in between – how boring L

In the coming weeks, I got my telephone connection in 30 mins, a new identification in exactly 10 mins. Amazing isn’t it, think of getting a new telephone connection in India, think of getting any Id from Govt. run agency,  How long does it  take ? Definitely not 10 mins. I would consider myself lucky if I got it in 10 working hours! What is different? Seriously, what is different?  With my limited intellect I think these are three differences that stand out

1.      Positive Intent to complete a task at an execution level

2.     A clear set of processes & direction of what is acceptable and what is not

3.     Last but not the least- integrity  and respect for the process at the execution level

The executive at any counter without fail always has the intent to complete the task, next, s/he has a set of clear direction - what documents are required (If you have it- great your job is done) if not- sorry next time. There is no negotiation at the execution level. Hence, there is no scope of and personal favors or opportunity to influence through bribes. It doesn’t matter if you are a CEO or a janitor, a super successful business man or a house help. All are equal. Isn’t that amazing or is it?

In India the higher up you are in the Society, the processes and the rules magically are more accommodative/compassionate. Which brings to me to my next topic- Driving in India.

People joke, if you have driven in India, you can drive anywhere. In my personal experience, if you have driven in India and try to drive like that anywhere other than china and a few other Asian countries; you would probably kill a few or get killed in the process!

I tried driving around timidly for a few months before legally I needed to get my American Driving license and for that I had to clear my driving test – Surprise Surprise!! Much to my dismay, I failed my first driving test. But before I get to how, let me explain the process of getting a driving license in Connecticut for those you already don’t know.

You are first expected to schedule an appointment for your driving knowledge test after having gone through  a 65+ page manual and have to get 20 out of 25 questions right to get a permit. The permit allows you to get into the driver’s seat along with a valid license holder.

After one has cleared the knowledge test. One is expected to take an 8 hour safe driving course without which one cannot appear for a driving test.  For teenagers,  the rules are even stricter- you cannot drive alone  post sundown, cannot text or use mobile phones while driving, cannot drink and drive- the penalties include suspension of license and hefty fine and a police record. For teenagers, a parent has to accompany and sit through the 8 hour safe driving class. Most parents I know, strictly follow these rules they cannot imagine otherwise.

And after all this you schedule a driving test, the instructor sits next to you giving you instructions to tests your knowledge. If you are not within your speed limit- you fail. If you don’t know much about your car- you fail. If you don’t change lanes by the rule book you fail. The first time round while watching out for everything else I jumped a red light! Oh boy, I had committed the cardinal sin of driving. So I was politely asked to take the test once again and had to a pay some 40 odd USD to rebook my appointment. But did I learn my lesson, sure I did and passed the second time round despite of being equally petrified the second time. And as I started sharing my experience with my colleagues I found it was not unusual to fail the driving test in the first attempt, in fact, there were quite a few who got it right the 3^rd time.

So what is big deal in getting DL in USA? Everybody gets it, what is so exceptional about my experience? What is exceptional is the experience of going through a similar process in both the countries?  Despite of the inconvenience of going through a relatively petrifying, long drawn procedure, there is sense of immense respect for the process and deep appreciation for the rules (in this case driving)- I will definitely think a few times before texting while driving. I will never allow my kid in the front seat of a car till she is old enough. I do not need a cop to tell me that. I am responsible for my own safety and know driving is a privilege and not my right.

This is the precise difference. In my country, everything I do is my damn right (I will drive on the wrong side of the road if there is traffic Jam, I will shout, kick and slap my helps if they don’t perform, I will play blaring music middle of the night because I am partying- damn my neighbors, I will just about do anything my rage allows me to and my environment has to put up with it because It is my bloody damn right!!) I have zero knowledge of my responsibility, my sense of responsibility comes from the ecosystem I have grown in. It is left open for interpretation. MNS feels responsible for generating funds for Indian Army by extorting Film makers, while the PM is responsible for visiting countries of all sizes to promote “Made in India” brand while people in the  City he lives struggle to breath clean air which is a basic human right. Chalta  hai -who cares?

Are there any aberration out here? Of course there are!( Well aren’t we witnessing a historical US presidential election this year – but world will agree with me that’s an exception), back to my topic-they are not majority. There are visible protest against any aberration. You wouldn’t find many mothers of my generation flaunting a picture of their teenage child without a helmet, you will rarely find a parent allowing a teenager access to a car without a license. Kids still do it – the difference out here is that the family, the society and the law is not supportive of violation unlike my home country. I get sick in my stomach when I hear “Chalta hai Yaar”. Nahin Chalta seriously nahin chalta hai!! For me failing to secure top grade, not excelling in academics - chalta hai but forgetting to learn- how to be a civilized human being – nahin chalta hai- not acceptable!!  I do not want us to be the ones who drags the glorious country back to the boon dogs, I hope for India to be safe for all, where I can get my telephone connection in 10 minutes and a new identification is 30. A country that is safe for a girl irrespective of the length of her skirt, or depth of her T shirt. I want to see the changes in my lifetime and not die with a hope that someday things will change.. chalta hai na!